WWE Monday Night Raw Results 9/1/08

Report by Adam Martin & Hunter Golden of WrestleView.com

WWE Monday Night Raw
St. Louis, MO
Commentators: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

- A graphic in tribute to Walter “Killer” Kowalski is shown.

- Randy Orton’s music hit to kick off the show. Orton walks out with his left arm in a sling. He enters the ring and grabs a mic. Orton says first off, as you can tell, he is still injured. He said he didn’t want to come back until he was 100%, but wanted to get something off his chest. Orton said a brand is only as strong as its champion. He said when he was WWE Champion, Raw was the strongest brand in WWE. Orton said now Raw is an absolute joke. He said take the Women’s Champion, Beth Phoenix. Orton said she walks around like a love sick puppy and is embarassing herself, saying this wasn’t 90210. He questions her being in love with the weakest Intercontinental Champion in the history of the WWE, Santino Marella. Orton said he could beat Santino while still injured. He then calls Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase worthless instead of priceless. He said they should get their titles back because he wouldn’t tolerate things like that. Orton said they aren’t the real problem…the real problem is a guy going around disgracing the World Heavyweight Championship. He said his name is CM Punk. Orton mentioned a few years ago, CM Punk was wrestling in no-name towns in no-name organizations while he was World Champion. He said it was until Punk climbed a ladder, grabbed a briefcase, cashed it in and was able to call himself a World Champion. Orton said he took offense to that and said his reign as champion was an insult. He said he would love to challenge CM Punk tonight and reclaim what is his. Orton said he can’t do that since he isn’t medically cleared. He added when he is, he will challenge Punk and reclaim Raw. Orton said his goal is to make everyone forget about the sorry history of Raw known as CM Punk.

Punk’s music hits as he gets a big reaction making his way to the ring. Punk gets in Orton’s face as a loud “CM PUNK” chant starts up. The two talk some trash. Punk said what he got was a headache listening to Orton talk back there. He said not everyone has a grandpa and dad to usher him into the business. Punk said not everyone gets to the top the same way and it didn’t matter how he did it because he is a World Champion. He said he doesn’t drink, smoke and most of all take joy rides on motorcycles to delay his return. Punk said he went from the Age of Orton to a complete afterthought. He said he didn’t blame Randy for running down every champion on Raw because he would be jealous too. Orton disputes being jealous until Punk cuts him off saying he would love to fight him right now, but this conversation would have to take place at a later time since he has a Battle Royal tonight and Championship Scramble to worry about this Sunday. He tells Orton to leave calling him pathetic. Orton steps back and agrees this conversation will have to take place at another time. Orton leaves the ring and Punk starts to run him down when JBL’s music hits. Orton walks by JBL staring him down and heads to the back as JBL walks down.

JBL gets in the ring and grabs a mic. Some guy is literally dressed in a suit and cowboy hat holding up a JBL sign in the crowd. JBL said fairy tales are not real and Punk’s reign as World Champion will run up this Sunday at Unforgiven. He thinks the odds are very much against Punk this Sunday and adds he won’t even have to pin him to win the title. JBL brings up Kane, Batista and Rey Mysterio.

Kane’s pyro goes off and he heads to the ring. Kane has a mic and gets in JBL’s face. Kane says a clothesline from hell huh? He said he has been to hell and didn’t see his clothesline anywhere. Kane said he did see Rey Mysterio there and made sure Mysterio wouldn’t be here tonight or at Unforgiven this Sunday no matter what Mike Adamle announced.

Batista’s music hits and we are all coming out tonight I guess. Batista hits the ring and pulls the mic from JBL. Batista goes to talk when he drops the mic and spears Kane and JBL. Punk stares him down and Batista takes him out with a spear as well.

- Michael Cole plugs tonight’s Battle Royal later tonight involving CM Punk, Batista, Kane, JBL and Rey Mysterio.

***Commercial***

- Later Tonight: ECW Battle Royal.

- John Cena’s music hits and the crowd goes nuts. It turns out it is Charlie Haas dressed up as Cena. He took the mic and told everyone not to worry because the Haas is here!

Charlie Haas vs. Kofi Kingston

The bell rings and Kingston and Haas lock up. Haas with a knee to the gut, but Kingston fires back with a huge monkey flip. Kingston with some elbows in the corner and Haas comes back with a big one of his own. Haas tries the Five Knuckle Shuffle, but Kingston kicks him in the head and then levels Haas with a huge dropkick. Kingston with a cross-body and a russian leg sweep on Haas. Kingston with double leg drop to the gut, but Haas with a big shot to the jaw. Haas attempts an FU, but Kingston rolls him up. Haas rolls through, Kingston fights out and Kingston hits the Trouble in Paradise kick to the face to pick up the pinfall.

Winner: Kofi Kingston

- Later Tonight: Contract signing between Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho.

***Commercial***

- Backstage, Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr. are arguing with Randy Orton about his comments earlier. Orton asked Cody if he remembered when they first met and when he slapped his father right in the face. Cody said he remembered and Orton slapped him. Orton called them the most talented wrestlers right now in WWE and that they needed a wake up call to get their tag titles back.

- Backstage, Mike Adamle is with Teddy Long talking about the Championship Scrambles at Unforgiven and how they could become a Labor Day tradition. Kane walks in upset saying that Rey Mysterio was never coming back and asked why Mike would lie to the fans that he was coming back. He said he wasn’t lying and noted Mysterio would be competing in a Battle Royal later tonight he hoped. Kane told Adamle to keep hoping.

***Commercial***

ECW Battle Royal
ECW Champion Mark Henry w/ Tony Atlas vs. Matt Hardy vs. Chavo Guerrero w/ Bam Neely vs. Finlay w/ Hornswogle vs. The Miz

The bell rings and everyone surrounds Mark Henry. Everyone goes after Henry and Henry shoves them all way in one big motion. Henry begins to level everyone with big right hands. Miz and Hardy give Henry a double-DDT. Miz and Hardy then drop elbows on Hardy and Miz takes out Hardy with a big clothesline. Finlay scoop slams Chavo over Henry. Finlay with a roll through on Chavo. Side Effect by Hardy on Miz. Hardy throws Miz over, but Miz holds on. Hardy and Finlay connect with a double clothesline. Chavo tries to throw Miz out, but Henry tosses both over the top.

The Miz is eliminated.
Chavo Guerrero is eliminated.

Henry splashed Finlay and took out Hardy with a big right hand. Henry with a splash on Finlay, but misses an attempt on Hardy. Finlay with a charge on Henry. Finlay and Hardy try to toss Henry over the top rope. Henry fights off and pushes both away. Henry picks up Finlay and tosses him over.

Finlay is eliminated.

We are down to Matt Hardy and Mark Henry. Hardy with a sledgehammer off the top on Henry. Hardy attempts the Twist of Fate, but Henry lifts Hardy up and throws him over the top rope.

Winner: ECW Champion Mark Henry

After the match, Tony Atlas comes into the ring and celebrates with Mark Henry who holds up the ECW Title. Jerry Lawler points out Henry eliminated everyone in tonight’s Battle Royal.

- Later Tonight: Raw Battle Royal with CM Punk, Batista, JBL, Kane and Rey Mysterio.

- A promo for Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels at Unforgiven is shown.

***Commercial***

- Backstage, we see Chris Jericho reviewing paperwork regarding a contract for his match with Shawn Michaels at Unforgiven this Sunday.

- In the arena, Jamie Noble is in the ring and we see Layla at ringside. Noble said he brought her out to the ring to prove himself when William Regal’s music hit.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

The bell rings and we get a lock up with Regal kneeing Noble to the corner. Regal with a huge overhead suplex on Noble and starts choking him with his knee. Regal with a full nelson on Noble. Noble steps on Regal’s toes, hits a few elbows, roll up by Regal, roll up by Noble, but Regal stops the action with a big right hand. Regal with an irish whip to the corner followed by some stiff kicks to the ground. Regal with a big release german suplex on Noble. Regal picks up Noble and Noble gets Regal in a small package for the win!

Winner: Jamie Noble

After the match, Layla smiles and seems impressed with Jamie Noble’s win.

- Backstage, Mickie James and Kelly Kelly are shown warming up.

***Commercial***

- Before the match, WWE Women’s Champion Beth Phoenix said Randy Orton needed to take notice of how dominate of a champion she was. Candice Michelle’s music hit to cut her off marking her return to WWE.

Candice Michelle, Mickie James & Kelly Kelly vs. WWE Women’s Champion Beth Phoenix, Jillian Hall & Katie Lea Burchill

We start with Kelly Kelly and Katie Lea Burchill. Kelly gets flipped backwards followed by a kick to the ribs on Katie. Tag to Mickie James who hits a Lou Thesz Press on Katie. Dropkick to Katie’s face. Katie tags in Jillian Hall. Katie and Jillian throw Mickie back into the corner, but Mickie fights back clearing house in the corner. Mickie attempts a huracanrana, but Mickie gets slammed down on her head in the corner. Tag to Beth Phoenix and she bounces Mickie off the top rope into a big suplex. Quick tag to Katie who comes in and chokes Mickie on the ropes. Mickie explodes from the corner with a big clothesline on Katie and a neckbreaker on Jillian. Tag to Beth, but Candice gets the tag and she elbows and kicks Beth. Wow, sloppy city with Candice botching what looked to be a hip toss on Beth. Candice is up top, Mickie and Kelly pull the Divas away, cross-body by Candice on Beth, but Beth rolls through and puts Candice on her shoulder. Candice jumps off and rolls up Beth for the quick pinfall.

Winners: Candice Michelle, Mickie James & Kelly Kelly

- A video package is shown of what went down at SummerSlam with Chris Jericho punching Shawn Michaels’ wife Rebecca and then Michaels begging for a match with Jericho at Unforgiven.

Santino ran down Randy Orton. He said he’d prove Orton wrong and become the greatest intercontinental champion in history. The HONKEY METER IS ON!!! YES! Santino is comparing himself to Honkey Tonk man as Honkey is considered the best IC Champ of them all. He began comparing statistics before D-Lo Brown’s Music hit and he came out for a match.

Santino Marella v. D-Lo Brown

Santino started pounding away on brown with rights and lefts before attempting a shoulder block but quickly ate a wheel kick. D-Lo hit an irish whip and a clothesline to follow up for a two count. Brown bounded off the ropes and after avoiding a Marella drop kick, Brown hit the shining wizard.

Brown went for the frog splash and completely whiffed, allowing Marella to cover him for the win.

Winner: Santino Marella via pin fall

Santino’s march to history keeps moving along.

HBK is in the back staring into space. Contract signing later on!

****Commercial****

John Morrison & The Miz v. Cryme Tyme

Morrison and Miz danced for Cryme Tyme before all heck broke loose. Before you know it, Ted Dibiase and Cody Rhodes are back on the scene and completely pearl harbored the #1 contenders. Rhodes DDT’d JTG off one of the belts before reclaiming their belts and walking off.

Winners: NO CONTEST

****Commercial****

Dibiase & Rhodes show off their haul to Randy Orton, who looked on approvingly.

Mickie James is talking about health care at the RNC. Kennedy’s there, too, but Kennedy’s don’t speak at Republican conventions.

Todd Grisham is with Batistia in the back. He asks what was on Batista’s mind heading into Unforgiven. Batista said his game plan was to destroy everyone. That’s nice.

Cole & Lawler run down the Unforgiven card. Now it’s battle royal time.

****Commercial****

Battle Royal
CM Punk v. Batista v. JBL v. Rey Mysterio v. Kane

Everyone went at it at the beginning with Batista taking both JBL and Kane down to the mat. Batista went into some big spots, hitting the spine buster on Kane and eventually a spear on JBL. He went to work on the world champion, but Punk tossed him off before eating a big spine buster. Punk took advantage of one Kane shoulder block and used it to dump Batista to the outside. JBL rushed at Punk and punk dumped JBL to boot.

That leaves Kane and CM Punk. Punk hit some strikes before Kane decked him with an upper cut and flung him into the top turnbuckle. Kane whipped the champion and mauled him with a follow up clothesline. Kane perched Punk on the top rope only for the champion to battle back and stay in the match. Kane hit a big boot that floored Punk before picking him up and hitting a side slam.

Kane hit another whip and missed the follow up which allow Punk to scrape and claw his way back into the match. He hit his kicks and punches before connecting with the high knee in the corner. He went for the bulldog, but Kane pushed him off and leveled him with another big boot. The action went back and forth before Punker went for a big spring board lariat but was caught in mid air. Kane backed him up and dumped him over the top rope and to the floor.

Winner: Kane

After the match Randy Orton mocked CM Punk. Punk got in his face and after the two exchanged words, Punk took Orton’s water and threw it in his face. Orton’s punked out.

As that was going on, Rey Mysterio’s music hit and he came out to the ring to a huge pop and went right at it with Kane. The two brawled around the ring before Mysterio eventually hit a hurricanranna that sent Kane reeling over the barricade and into the crowd.

****Commercial****

Jerry Lawler is in the ring and he’s the moderator for all this fun and the official signing for the non-sanctioned match. GM Mike Adamle says if there’s any physicality between the two, the match would be called off. Jericho came out first followed by HBK. Jericho didn’t even look Michaels in the face while HBK can’t keep his eyes off Jericho.

All there is to do is sign documents. The two sign the documents and we’re on. Jericho told Lawler ‘enough’ before asking HBK why he needs all the security. Michaels said it wasn’t his security. If it was his way, it’d just be the two of them. Jericho said he didn’t feel the need to be monitored so once HBK gave the ‘ok’, he dismissed the security and Lawler. It’s just HBK and Jericho.

Jericho said he did something he’d never do for him. He said he sat his wife and kids down and told them he wouldn’t be a lying, manipulative ego maniac like Shawn Michaels. He forbade them from watching Unforgiven because he didn’t want them seeing the brutality he was capable of. He said he wouldn’t go easy on him because he hit his wife in the face… he was going to end his career and show people what happened to people who lived life like he does.

He said just like he told Ric Flair, he was going to put him out of his misery. He said he wasn’t sorry for any of what he’d done to him and was proud of what he did. He said he’d finish him off for good. He said when he was a forgotten memory in this business, he’d only have himself to blame.

Michaels said he took comfort in the fact that Jericho’s family wouldn’t be watching, because his wouldn’t be, either. He said some day he’d tell them about this. He’d tell them about how sometimes it’s good to turn the other cheek, but sometimes it’s good to stare evil in the face and spit in it. He said he’d show Jericho no remorse at Unforgiven and would never apologize for who he is. He said at Unforgiven, it was an appropriate name. He vowed to never forgive Jericho for what he had done to him. He just hoped God would forgive him.

Lance Cade jumped him from behind but HBK caught him and sent him to the mat before putting a pretty mean beat down on him. Jericho attempted to interfere, but Michaels lunged and that was enough to scare him off. The two stared each other down as the show went off the air.

*SPOILERS* ECW (9/2) and Smackdown (8/29) Taping Results from Pittsburgh, Pennslyvania

Report by Mike Shannon and PWrestlingNews.com

Dark Match
Jake Hager pinned Jamie Noble in a pretty boring match.

Funaki pinned some guy with sparkling tights with a rollup.

ECW On Sci-Fi for 9/2/08
On the dirt sheet Mark Henry, Chavo Guerrero, Finlay and Matt Hardy have a big confrontation that turns into a big brawl and the faces clear the ring.

Backstage everyone is still brawling so Teddy Long sets up an 8 man tag for later.

Gavin Spears is up next vs. Super Crazy.
Super Crazy wins with a springboard moonsault off the second rope.

Ryan Braddock vs. Ricky Ortiz is next.
Ortiz wins with a splash off the ropes.

8 man tag next. It’s Finaly, Dreamer, Hardy and Evan Bourne vs. Chavo, Miz, Morrison, Henry. The faces all hit their finishers on Henry for the win.

SmackDown! Tapings for 8/29
Undertaker kicks off Smackdown and promises to take Vicki’s soul, then lights the posts on fire and leaves.

R Truth makes his Smackdown debut against Kenny Dykstra to a very small pop and wins with an axe kick.

Maryse and Natayla beat Maria and Michelle McCool. Terrible of course but Maria’s pushup bra adds a star to the match.

Jeff Hardy pins MVP in the best match so far. A long match ended by the swanton and then Shelton comes in and lays them both out.

Hawkins and Ryder start a match with Jesse and Festus but the Big Show comes down and destroys everyone. He promises that he would not be overlooked anymore.

Victoria takes on Brie Bella. Brie wins with a surprise rollup.

WWE Champion Triple H vs. U.S. Champion Shelton Benjamin.
Very mat based match which means it was boring as hell with no crowd heat. Triple H looks very unmotivated. Great Khali comes down at the end to distract Triple H but he still hits Shelton with the pedigree for the win.

Post match Khali lays out HHH and I’m assuming the show goes off the air.

Dark Match
HHH challenges Khali to a Pittsburg street fight.

*SPOILERS* WWE Smackdown Taping Results from Norfolk, Virginia

Report by Cameron Gray and PWinsider.com

Vickie Guerrero told Victoria that both Edge and The Undertaker are at Smackdown tonight.

Natalya Nedihart and Maryse beat Michelle McCool and Maria when Natalya rolled up McCool.

We were told that Triple H will be in action tonight.

Tazz and Jim Ross then came out to ringside.

In a really good US Title match, Jeff Hardy beat Shelton Benjamin when MVP ran in.

Brian Kendrick beat Scott Goldman with the Kendrick.

Triple H was talking backstage when a match was made with Kenny Dykstra for later on tonight.

HHH beat Dykstra with The Pedigree. After the match, he had a staredown with The Great Khali and clotheslined him to the floor.

MVP cut a great promo about Jeff Hardy backstage. Words can’t do it justice.

Vickie Guerrero chooses to leave since both Edge and Undertaker are at the show.

They ran an R Truth promo.

Vickie heads to her limo but Edge, in psycho mode, is there and brings her back into the arena in her wheelchair.

Vladimir Koslov beat Festus with a headbutt to the ribs.

Edge wheeled Vickie to the ring. The show ended with a great Edge promo, complete with a crying Vickie.

The Undertaker never did appear.

Big Show knocked out Ryan Braddock.

Monday Night Raw (07/14/08): The Animal Unleashed

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Monday Night Raw (07/14/08): The Animal UnleashedWelcome to another Monday Night Raw with yours truly Jetsetpoker. I seemed to get all good feedback last week so nothing really is going to change. I’m going to add ratings to longer promo’s/segments due to request but other then that everything will stay the same. Enjoy.

 

Monday Night Raw (07/14/08)

Live from Raleigh, North Carolina

A recap is show of Batista pinning Kane in a Fatal Four Way for the chance to face CM Punk at the Great American Bash. The recap also shows Kane snapping at the end of last week saying “Is he alive or dead?!?!”

Stephanie and Shane McMahon both show up on screen. Stephanie and Shane repeat what they have said the past 2 weeks that we need to pull together during this time of need. Shane says that if actions don’t change then action will be taken.

It cuts to HBK attacking Y2J live in the arena. HBK is on top of Y2J pounding him with lefts and rights. Eventually Lance Cade makes the save and pulls Jericho to the back while HBK is being held back by referee’s who came running out to break up the fight.

As HBK is being escorted to the back Kane’s music hits. Kane comes walking to the ring with a bag in his hand. Kane chases off some production crew and stares down Lawler and Michael Cole. Kane starts to scream “I’m Sorry!” Kane repeats he’s sorry a few times and then walks to the back.

The camera cuts to the backstage and HBK is beating the hell out of Lance Cade. Y2J kicks HBK off of Cade and security breaks all 3 men up. All hell is breaking lose tonight…and with that we have are first match!

Match 1: Mickie James vs Katie Lea

Both women lock up. Katie Lea puts Mickie James in an arm lock and Mickie reverses it into a roll up for a 1 count. Katie Lea connects with a kick to Mickie’s stomach and goes for a snap mare but Mickie rolls threw it and takes Katie Lea off her feet for another quick pin. Katie Lea kicks out at 2. Mickie catches Katie Lea with a few punches to the side of the head. Mickie tries to whip Katie Lea into the corner but Katie Lea reverses it and whips Mickie in. Katie Lea comes charging in but is caught with an elbow from Mickie. Mickie uses the corner to wrap her legs around Katie Lea to try for a hurricarana but Katie Lea throws Mickie over the ropes. Mickie lands on the apron and tries to catch Katie Lea with a shoulder to the stomach but Katie Lea side steps it and kicks Mickie in the face. Katie Lea drags Mickie back into the ring by her hair. Katie Lea goes for a pin but only gets a 2 count. Katie Lea puts her knee into Mickie’s back and wrenches on her head with a headlock. Katie lets Mickie get up and Mickie runs to the ropes but is caught with an arm drag by Katie Lea. Katie goes for another quick cover for only a 2. Katie connects with a hard kick to Mickie’s rib cage and then locks Mickie in a choke hold. Mickie counters by throwing Katie over her but Katie runs right back at Mickie and connects with a hard knee. Katie then runs Mickie into the corner with a shoulder and sets Mickie on the top rope. Mickie fights back by kicking Katie away. Mickie goes for a spinning DDT but Katie Lea counters by pulling Mickie off the ropes. Mickie lands on her feet and connects with a hard right. Mickie uses the turnbuckle again and connects with a head scissors on Katie Lea. Mickie goes back to the top rope and hits the Lou Thez press from the top rope for the 3 count! Mickie gets the win after a Lou Thez Press from the top rope over Katie Lea.

(Honestly, this was a horrible match. Both these ladies are capable of putting on a solid bout. This match was very sloppy and all the punches/kicks looked very weak. Not a good start at all. .5 out of 5)

Katie Lea gets in Mickie’s face after the match and Paul Burchill comes from behind and holds onto Mickie for Katie Lea. Katie grabs the title and slaps Mickie. Kofi Kingston comes from the back and Paul and Katie Lea roll out of the ring. Kofi challenges Paul Burchill to an Intercontinental Title match. Paul accepts and its right…now!

Cut to commercial…

Match 2: Kofi Kingston vs Paul Burchill for the Intercontinental Championship

We join the match already in progress. Burchill whips Kofi into the ropes and connects with a shoulder block. Burchill runs into the ropes again and Kofi quickly gets back on his feet and leapfrogs Burchill. Kofi jumps over Burchill again and then connects with a jumping elbow to Burchill’s face. Burchill stumbles up into the corner and Kofi runs at him and jumps onto the 2nd rope. Kofi connects with a few punches before doing a back flip off of him and then connecting with a running shoulder block into Burchill’s stomach. Burchill kicks Kofi in the stomach and tries to go for a suplex but Kofi reverses it into a roll up. Burchill kicks out at 2. Kofi twists Burchill’s arm and continues to apply pressure to the shoulder area. Burchill backs Kofi into the corner and whips Kofi into the other turnbuckle. Kofi does a little up and over move on the running Burchill. Burchill turns around and Kofi connects with an arm drag. Kofi goes for a pin but Burchill kicks out at 1. The crowd is starting to get behind Kofi chanting “Kofi, Kofi, Kofi” Kofi twists the arm of Burchill again and goes back to work on the shoulder. Burchill whips Kofi down by his hair and runs to the ropes but Kofi connects with a standing dropkick to the face. Kofi goes for another cover and gets another 2 count. Kofi immediately goes back to work on Burchill’s arm. Burchill backs Kofi up into the corner and counters with a big shoulder block. Burchill whips Kofi into the corner again and Kofi tries to counter again with his up and over move but Burchill catches him and throws him strait up. As Kofi is falling face first to the ground Burchill connects with a vicious kick to the ribcage in mid-air. Burchill connects with some more kicks and a few body crosses. Burchill goes for a cover but Kingston kicks out at 2. Kofi tries to get up but Burchill unleashes another vicious kick to the ribs. Burchill with a knee to the rib’s and a quick cover but only a 2 count. Burchill puts Kofi in a bear hug on the canvas. Kofi starts to work his way back to his feet and breaks the hold with a few elbows. Kofi charges into the ropes but Burchill counters by just tossing Kofi up into the air. Burchill gives Kofi a few more shots to the ribs and goes for a cover. Kofi kicks out at 2. Burchill picks Kofi up and nails Kofi with a reverse flapjack. Burchill goes for another cover and Kofi kicks out again at 2. Burchill whips Kingston into the corner and Kingston counters with a boot to the face of Burchill. Kofi connects with a few rights and a kick to the side. Burchill tries to clothesline Kingston but Kingston ducks and bounces off the ropes with a clothesline of his own. Kingston hits a standing dropkick. Kingston hits Burchill with a Russian leg sweep. Kingston then connects with his double leg drop move (needs a name). Katie Lea gets up on the apron but Mickie pulls her down. As Burchill gets back to his feet Kingston connects with the Trouble In Paradise! 1..2..3! Kofi Kingston defeats Paul Burchill with the Trouble In Paradise. (Eh, hard to rate this one. I thought it was a bit disappointing given the time that it was allotted. It didn’t seem like there styles meshed well but at the same time it looked like Kingston was trying to show he can do more then just be a high flyer. The match served its purpose of getting Kingston over so I’ll give it a 2 out of 5.)

Santino Marella is shown backstage talking to Matt Striker. Santino tells Striker that he made a open invitation to the entire WWE locker room. Santino says someone is “death meat”. Kane walks in and asks Marella where Punk is. Santino asks Kane if he tried the Pepsi machine. Kane asks where punk is again. Santino says he saw him earlier in the locker room down the hall.

Cut to commercial…

We come back from commercial and Kane is in Punk’s locker room with that bag still in his hand. Kane tells Punk deep down inside he knows he’s dead. Punk asks what Kane is talking about. Kane says they have been tag team partners before but tonight Kane needs Punk in the ring 1 on 1. Punk says he has the biggest match of his life in 6 days and Kane decides to come in and challenge him now? Kane says this isn’t about the title. Kane says he needs this. Punk says he needs this to. He needs to prove to everybody that he’s not a fluke. Punk accepts Kane’s challenge. Punk asks what is with the bag Kane is holding. Kane just laughs and walks away.

Todd Grishim is backstage with John Cena. Grishim says that JBL challenged him to a New York City parking lot brawl at the Great American Bash. Matthews asks Cena if he can tell him what a New York City parking lot brawl is. Cena says that since Vince has been out that at the wishes of his family he has tried to go down that isle with a smile on his face but he says he can’t do it anymore because of JBL’s challenge. Cena says if you know of this match and then you know why there isn’t a smile on his face. Cena says this isn’t even a match, it’s a war! Cena says on that day we won’t find out who the best athlete is but who can break the most bones on concrete. Cena says we will find out if a man’s pride will fold and if careers will be cut short. Cena says Grishim’s question shouldn’t be what the match is about but why would he accept such a challenge. Cena says it’s no breaking news that he doesn’t like JBL. Cena says he figured if there going to fight one more time its only right that it takes place at the Great American Bash. Cena says JBL considers himself a great American and it makes Cena sick. Cena says he will be happy to grab the hair of a great American and smash his face threw window after window of every car in the parking lot. Cena says he will take great pleasure in hoisting a 200 pound car door over his head and seeing real fear in JBL’s eyes. Cena says you’re looking at a battle hungry war warden angry son of a bitch. Cena says he’s not going to predict victory he says he is going to tell you fact that hell is going to come to earth. Cena says he won’t stop till JBL remembers the name John Cena. Cena says he accepts Bradshaw’s challenge. Cena says he has a challenge of his own though. He challenges Bradshaw to find 2 partners for a 6 man tag match with Cryme Time and John Cena. Cena says if you want some, come get some. (Solid interview. Cena added a lot of intensity to this feud, even if it did come off as a Braveheart speech. Cena is really making this feud work with his promos. 4 out of 5.)

Cut to commercial break…

Back from commercial Santino is back in the ring waiting to see who accepts his challenge. Beth Phoenix’s music hits and she makes her way to the ring.

Match 3: Santino Marella vs Beth Phoenix

They lock up in the middle of the ring and Beth is pushing Santino back. Santino shows Beth his muscles and Beth responds by showing Santino her muscles. Santino pushes Beth. Beth tries to smack Santino but Santino counters by sweeping her legs and taking her to the ground. Beth quickly rolls on top of Santino and starts connecting with punches on Santino. Santino gets Beth Phoenix in a headlock and says “The power of a man!!!” Beth counters with a backbreak to Santino. Beth hits Santino with a clothesline and then body slams Santino. Beth goes for a cover but only gets 2. Beth tries to whip Santino into the corner but Santino stops and says “I’m a man!” and whips Beth into the other turnbuckle. Santino comes charging in and Beth moves out of the way and connects with a roll up on Santino. Beth gets the 3! Beth Phoenix defeats Santino Marella with a rollup. (While the match wasn’t anything great but it was meant as a comedy match and it fit its roll perfectly. Santino is great on the mic and they use him brilliantly. 2.5 out of 5)

Kelly Kelly is shown backstage stretching for her match that is…next!

Cut to commercial

Back from commercial and Kelly Kelly is making her way to the ring. Before the match can start Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr. make there way to the ring. DiBiase says that they don’t care that Kelly has a match tonight. He says they have something to say so they suggest she leaves. Kelly slowly leaves the ring. Cody grabs the mic and says that the criticism they have been receiving isn’t fair. Both men aren’t bad people, they’re realistic people. Cody says they are not they’re fathers, they’re better! Cody says when you’re this talented you don’t pay dues. DiBiase says the best part is that they are still in their early twenties. In 10 years they will be in the prime of their life. Before DiBiase can finish what he has to say Hacksaw Jim Duggan’s music hits. Duggan says he’s known these guys since they were kids. He knows they’re dads to. He says that they’re dads are like him…old school! He says Cody is right, as performers they are on another level but as people they have a whole lot of growing up to do. Cody says that he makes some valid points. He says he guesses they could grow up but when he thinks of the phrase grow up he thinks of a 54 old man in gym shorts trying to relive his glory days when his glory days weren’t all that glorious to begin with. DiBiase says he thinks of something that Stone Cold Steve Austin use to say which is innless you think you have what it takes to become a champion then you shouldn’t even be in the WWE. DiBiase asks Duggan if he actually thinks he has what it takes to win a title. DiBiase says nothing has changed in the last 25 years. He still carries around the same 2×4 and says the same lame chants trying to get a reaction. DiBiase tells Duggan that he’s pathetic. If anyone needs to grow up, it’s Duggan. The champions leave the ring. JBL shows up on the titantron and says he was very impressed by them. He says that he is right they don’t have to pay there dues, he is going to offer them the chance of a lifetime to main event Monday Night RAW with JBL. DiBiase and Rhodes look like they are going to accept the offer. (Surprisingly awesome promo by both Rhodes and DiBiase. Especially Rhodes. 4 out of 5)

Cut to commercial…

Match 4: Kane vs CM Punk

Punk tries to connect with a few kicks to Kane but Kane dodges them. Kane throws a punch but Punk ducks and connects with a kick. Kane grabs punk by the neck and throws him into the corner. Kane comes running into a kick from Punk. Punk fires with a few more kicks to Punk. Kane whips Punk to the ropes and Punk tries to slide in between Kane’s legs but Kane grabs punk by his hair and brings him back to his feet. Kane connects with a right hand to the back of the neck. Kane puts Punk in the corner and starts laying in some heavy rights to Punk. Kane whips Punk into the ropes and puts his head down for a back body drop but Punk counters with a kick to the face. Punk connects with a dropkick that sends Kane to the outside. Kane starts to get frustrated on the outside. Punk goes for a slidekick but Kane moves out of the way and connects with a uppercut to Punk. Kane throws Punk back in the ring and whips Punk into the turnbuckle. Kane nails Punk with a big clothesline in the corner. Kane goes for a pin but Punk kickouts at 2. Kane picks up Punk and body slams him. Kane sits Punk up and runs into the ropes to hit a dropkick to Punk’s face. Punk goes for a pin but Punk gets his shoulder up at 2 again. Punk starts to mount some kicks to Kane but Kane puts that to a stop as he connects with a big boot to Punks face. Kane puts Punk in a choke hold on the ground. Punk fights his way back to his feet but Kane starts pounding him down again. Kane whips Punk into the ropes and tries for a clothesline but Punk counters trying to bring Kane down for a pin. Kane doesn’t budge and grabs Punk by his neck. Kane starts trash talking Punk and Punk breaks up the choke with a backfist to Kane’s head. After a few more punches and a kick to the side of the head Kane is wobbling. Punk hits an enzeguri on Kane but Kane still doesn’t go down. Kane stumbles into the corner and Punk nails Kane with his running knee. Punk connects with another running knee to Kane’s jaw and this time tries to follow up with a bulldog but Kane throws Punk into the corner. Punk connects with a elbow on a running Kane. Punk dropkicks Kane’s knee out and Kane goes down to one knee. Punk connects with a kick to the side of the head and Kane goes down. Punk goes for a pin but Kane kicks out at 1. Punk goes to the top rope and hits a cross body block. Kane kicks out at 2. Punk tries to pick Kane up for the GTS but couldn’t get Kane up. Kane grabs Punk by the neck for the chokeslam but Punk counters with a standing kick to the temple. Punk comes running at Kane but Kane moves out of the way and throws Punk out of the ring. Punk lands on the apron and tries to jump back in but Kane pushes him to the floor. Punk blocks getting thrown into the ringpost and counters by throwing Kane into the ring post. Punk hits a bulldog off the apron onto Kane. The ref keeps counting as both men are outside. Punk rolls into the ring at a 9 count and Kane gets counted out. CM Punk wins by countout over Kane. Kane snaps after the match and starts throwing chairs into the ring. Kane spears Punk to the ground and starts clubbing him with punches. Kane picks up one of the chairs and puts CM Punks head in-between the seat and the chair part. Kane goes to the top rope but Batista starts coming to the ring to break it up. Batista spears Kane when he gets into the ring. Batista grabs a chair and nails Kane as he gets back to his feet. Kane falls to the outside and Batista helps Punk back up to his feet. Punk tries to shake Batista’s hand but Batista says I’m not your friend, I want your title. Punk pushes Batista. Batista nails a spinebuster on Punk and leaves. (Not a bad match at all, 2.5 out of 5. Could have been a lot better if given time but it was suppose to help get Punk over some more before the GAB and it did its job successfully while still allowing Kane’s crazy storyline to continue)

A recap is shown of last week Cryme Tyme and Cena destroying JBL’s limo last week.

Cut to commercial…

Back from commercial and Y2J’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring with Lance Cade.

Match 5: Chris Jericho vs Paul London

Jericho starts off the match by bombarding London with clubbing blows to the back. London connects with a few kicks but Jericho counters with a headbutt. Jericho hits a running boot off the ropes. Jericho tosses London to the outside. Jericho rolls out and slams London into the padding on the rail. Jericho rolls London back into the ring and connects with a boot to the ribs. Jericho puts London on the 2nd rope and starts to choke him. Jericho stands on the back of his head using the rope for leverage to choke London. Jericho tells Cade to watch for HBK. London connects with some punches and nails Jericho with a spinning kick. London tries to whip Jericho into the turnbuckle but Jericho reverses it and London catches Jericho with a boot to the face. London flips to the outside of the ring. London goes for a springboard splash and Jericho moves out of the way. Jericho nails London with a clothesline to the back of London’s head. Jericho whips London into the turnbuckle and nails London with a double underhook backbreaker. Jericho puts London into the Walls of Jericho and London has to tap out. Chris Jericho makes Paul London tap to the Walls of Jericho. Jericho grabs a mic and tells Paul London to listen very closely. Jericho says London should use this match to change the career path he is on. He could take Chris Jericho’s rode which leads to honor and integrity or he could follow HBK’s rode which leads to defeat and lies. He says if London follows Jericho’s path and achieve greatness or follow HBK’s path which leads to nothing but pain. Finally, HBK music hits and he comes out with a microphone in hand. HBK tells Jericho that everybody knows that nobody is going to change either of they’re minds. HBK tells Jericho that he doesn’t know the meaning of truth and righteousness. HBK says they do agree on one thing, this Sunday at the Great American Bash the worst is still yet to come. The fans chant HBK as we go to commercial. (Not a great match but I think it was pretty clear it wasn’t suppose to be. These 2 could have a great match if told to but not tonight. 1.5 out of 5 for the match. Jericho and HBK should be great at the GAB. )

Back from commercial and Jamie Noble is backstage talking to Layla telling her that with Vince out this is the perfect chance for them to hook up. Layla says she doesn’t date short men and Noble tells Layla to google it that 5’6 is the average height of men in America. Noble says the next guy that comes in here he’s going to challenge to a match to prove how much of a man he is. Snitsky walks in and tells Noble to shut his mouth. Noble challenges Snitsky to a match. Snitsky follows Noble to the ring. Noble jumps Snitsky as he gets in the ring. Snitsky throws Noble off but he comes back and starts throwing more blows. Snitsky nails Noble with a knee and whips him into the corner. Snitsky charges at Noble and Noble nails Snitsky with a boot to the face. Noble says “This is for you Layla” and jumps off the 2nd rope. Snitsky takes his head off with a boot to the face. Snitsky picks Noble up and finishes him off with the pump handle slam.

Cut to commercial…

Replay is shown off Shane and Stephanie from earlier tonight.

JBL, Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr make there way to the ring…

Cut to another commercial…

Cryme Tyme comes down to the ring, followed by John Cena and its time for our main event.

Match 6: JBL, Cody Rhodes, and Ted DiBiase Jr vs John Cena, and Cryme Tyme

Cody Rhodes and John Cena start things off. Cena connects with a boot to Rhodes and a punch to the face. Cena whips Rhodes into the corner and nails Rhodes with a suplex out of the corner. Cena starts unloading on Rhodes in the corner. Cena tags in Chad and Chad connects with a punch to the arm of Rhodes. Rhodes starts to fight back but Chad nails Rhodes with a big clothesline. Chad bench presses Rhodes over his head but Rhodes gets out and starts clubbing Chad with punches to the back of the head. Rhodes tags in DiBiase and he quickly goes to work on Chad. DiBiase whips Chad into the ropes but Chad knocks DiBiase down with a shoulder block. Chad throws DiBiase face first into the turnbuckle and hits DiBiase with a double underhook suplex. Shad goes for a cover but DiBiase kicks out at 2. Shad with a body slam. Shad tags in JTG. They hit a double team move where Shad grabs JTG by his feet and slams him onto DiBiase. JTG goes for the pin but DiBiase kicks out at 2. DiBiase connects with a boot to the midsection of JTG and quickly tags Rhodes back in. DiBiase whips JTG to the ropes, JTG runs overtop of DiBiase but Rhodes connects with a standing dropkick to JTG. Rhodes connects with a few punches to JTG. JTG fires back with some punches of his own. Rhodes goes for a clothesline and JTG counters with a sick looking reverse neckbreaker. JTG with a quick pin for a 2 count. Rhodes hits JTG with a knee to the midsection. JTG runs into the ropes and Rhodes goes for a clothesline but JTG ducks. As JTG hits the other side of the ring JBL connects with a punch to the back of JTG’s head. JBL comes into the ring and starts beating down JTG in the corner. JBL is distracting the ref and Rhodes/DiBiase start choking JTG behind the refs back. JBL stomps on JTG’s hand and starts throwing some more big rights. JBL tags in DiBiase who connects with a few boots to the head. JTG fights back with a few punches but DiBiase kicks out JTG’s knee before he can get anything going. DiBiase tags in Rhodes who gives JTG a wishbone. Rhode’s runs into JTG in the corner but JTG nails Rhodes with a boot. Rhodes counters by kicking JTG in the injured knee. Rhode’s locks JTG’s knee in place and tags in DiBiase who connects with a elbow drop onto it. DiBiase grabs JTG and starts kicking him underneath his knee. DiBiase goes to work on JTG’s knee grinding his own knee into it. The match cuts to commercial…when we come back from commercial Rhodes and Shad are in. Rhodes kicks Shad’s knee out from under him now. Rhodes hits a knee to the face of Shad. Shad rolls into the corner and Rhodes tags in JBL. JBL pounds down Shad in the corner and kicks him in the head. JBL nails Cena with a cheap shot. JBL gives Cena the you can’t see me look. Shad gets to his feet but JBL hits another big clothesline. JBL connects with elbow after elbow after elbow to Shad. JBL tags in Rhodes who comes off the top rope with a punch to the mid section. Rhodes goes to work on the knee of Shad . Shad kicks Rhodes off but Rhodes comes right back and slams Shad’s face into the corner. Rhodes goes for a bulldog but Shad counters by throwing Rhodes off of him in the air. Shad is trying to must up enough strength to make the tag to Cena but Rhodes cuts Shad off and nails Cena off the apron. Rhodes pulls Shad back to his side of the ring and tags in DiBiase who hits a elbow drop. DiBiase goes for a pin but Shad kicks out at 2. DiBiase hits a few of the old school Million Dollar Man punches to the ground. DiBiase tags Rhodes back in and they both go to work on Shad in the corner. Rhodes slams Shads face into the turnbuckle. Rhodes goes up to the top and goes for a moonsault but Shad moves out of the way. Shad makes the hot tag to Cena who explodes into the ring. Cena hits 2 big clotheslines on Rhodes followed by 2 shoulder blocks. Cena whips Rhodes into the corner. DiBiase comes in but gets suplexed by Cena. Cena hits the 5 knuckle shuffle on DiBiase. Cena hits the FU on DiBiase. Rhodes gets a kick to the guy followed by a blockbuster. Cena goes to the top rope and connects with a leg drop to the back of Rhodes head. Cena locks Rhodes into the STFU. JBL comes in from behind and kicks JBL in the back of the head. The ref calls for the bell and this one is over. Cena and Cryme Tyme over Bradshaw, DiBiase and Rhodes by disqualification. (The match was OK but nothing special. Served its purpose as the main event. 2 out of 5)

JBL starts to head to the back and Cena chases after him. JBL runs all the way out to the parking lot. Cena goes outside but doesn’t see Bradshaw. JBL comes out of nowhere and hits Cena with a steel rod. JBL set Cena up against a white car. JBL then got into another car and drove right at Cena’s head. JBL crashed and when the camera panned back Cena was nowhere to be found. The show then faded to black…

Tonight’s RAW pretty much served its purpose of setting up the Great American Bash this Sunday. I didn’t expect to see any amazing matches which I didn’t but everything other then the Mickie/Katie Lea everything was about average. I would like to see a real London/Jericho match down the line but I doubt that will ever happen. Overall I would give RAW a 7 out of 10 tonight.

As always if you have any feedback or comments just shoot me a mail at MSN1983@yahoo.com or PM me on the LOPForums.com Also if you get a chance make sure to check out the Column Forums on LOP. It has some of the best up and coming new writers. Make sure to check out Joey Shibobi – The Shinobi Slam

WWE News: An Update On John Cena Following Car Crash Angle On Raw

In WWE.com’s Raw results, they’re saying that John Cena was simply “grazed” after John Bradshaw Layfield appeared to have crashed an automobile into him at the end of the show. Cena is fine enough in the storyline to fight JBL in their NYC Parking Lot Brawl match at The Great American Bash next Sunday.

Here is what WWE.com wrote regarding Cena:

“After knocking Cena unconscious, Layfield propped him up and attempted to smash a car into the prone Superstar. Luckily, John Cena managed to escape at the last minute and was only grazed, meaning that Cena vs. JBL will still take place on Sunday night.”

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